A Layer at A Time

11/27/20211 min read

If you are connected with me on my social media accounts you might notice I posted my raw selfie, one thing I never did ever before (though that was posted in close friends circle, lol).

I have given a thought for a while now that I have been very private about myself. It feels natural for me to keep myself for the closest ones and somewhat hidden from the outer world. The trauma leads me to this kind of safety box that I build for myself. I laugh and cry hard only to 2-3 people I know in life. Very few of my friends understand my structure of thinking and I feel super fine with that. I don't mind nor care for people who don't really understand me. To say the least, I don't wanna be bothered by other people's opinions of me.

Last week I had a nice lunch with a dear friend of mine who at some point has witnessed my ups and downs. The conversation we had triggered me to do something I didn't really think about before. That is to be more open about me, promote my activities and visions, and overall take the courage to step forward.

I won't deny that just by imagining me being open to, actually, people I know is already quite scary. Moreover, if I scale up the idea to be accessible for people I don't know. But I know for sure if I keep being like this, it won't help me to grow. I want to give to the community and see that my contribution is impactful. I can only do that when I am open to people.

So, please bear with me. I am peeling each layer of myself; the hurts, pains and all the good and bad things that made me this way. And, thank you for trusting my process of being.

naked woman lying on gray bedspread
naked woman lying on gray bedspread